New Category

As of this morning, I decided a needed a new category in this blog:

JEREMIADS

This is from Webster’s

jer·e·mi·ad

Pronunciation:\ˌjer-ə-ˈmī-əd, –ˌad\ Function: noun: a prolonged lamentation or complaint; also : a cautionary or angry harangue

The first post in this new and soon to be overflowing category concerns one of my all-time favorite movies, The Lost Boys. I first saw it when I was five. I begged and begged and begged my Dad to let me watch it. It had everything I loved at that age, motorcycles, punk looking guys with mohawks and earrings, and vampires. My Dad decided that he would watch it first and then decide if it was too scary or contained too much “adult content” for me. The Lord smiled that day (or more likely the devil) and I got to watch it, and was hooked. I have definitely considered getting a Lost Boys tattoo at some point in time.

Well, this morning, as I was scrolling with my daily website checks, and came across this on punknews:

Aiden covers Gerard McMann’s “Cry Little Sister” for Lost Boys sequel

Aiden have recorded a cover of Gerard McMann’s “Cry Little Sister” for the upcoming sequel to the 1987 film, Lost Boys. The sequel, due more than 20 years after the original vampire/teen flick, is expected later this year or in 2009.

The original movie included Kiefer Sutherland and 80s movie staples Corey Haim and Corey Feldman. Feldman at least is expected to return to reprise his role.

You can check out Aiden’s cover of the song here.

Contributed by GlamBalam. Posted on Tuesday, June 24, 2008 at 3:00 PM (EDT)

I was FLOORED. My tempered flared more than it has in yeeeeaaaars. I immediately relocated to the Interweb Movie Data Base to further investigate the claims of another sequel threatening the reputation of one of my beloved classics. Unfortunately, when I arrived, my worst fears came to life. Ladies and gentlement of the jury, I submit Exhibit A: “The Trailer”

Now, what makes me really angry besides the whole principle of the matter.

1. “One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach, all the damn vampires.”

As I’m sure you noticed in “The Trailer” the vampires themselves looked terrible! The originals looked nothing like the btvs-ripoffs that these do. The originals had simple lifted eyebrows, red eyes, and fangs. It was the way they talked and acted normal that made them scary! Way to go make-up guys…

2. “Notice anything unusual about Santa Carla yet?”

Yeah. The sequel takes place in freakin Luna Bay! Where the hell is that?! Santa Carla was a real place! How did the vampires get to Luna Bay?! That brings me to a good point. All the vampires were killed in the original! How do you make a sequel when all of the villains die?! This is isn’t Friday the 13th or Nightmare on Elm Street so it just doesn’t make any sense! Ahhhhh!

3. “You’ll never grow old, Michael, and you’ll never die. But you must feed!”

One of Keifer Sutherland’s best lines from the original. They butchered it. “You’ll never grow old, you’ll never die, and you’ll never know fear again.” What is that?! I swear, if the writers tried to reuse any of the sweet one liners at the end, I may fly back to Cali and hunt them down.

Something funny, when I originally watched it, I thought that the sister was being played by Lauren of Laguna Beach/The Hills fame and started laugh a little. However, upon further review (and reading the names of the cast) this is not true. She is actually played by Autumn Reeser, who appeared on several episodes of the OC, coincidentally enough.

Ok, so there are a couple of good things. They did manage to bring in the Coreys. However, it’s not like they have a whole list of work they were passing up to work on this amazing script. They also got the actor that played the other Frog brother, Alan (Corey Feldman played Edgar Frog). That’s about it though.

All this aside, I’m sure I’ll go see it anyway. However, if you see a guy throwing stuff at the screen out of pure hatred and frustration, it’s probably me.